Thoughts and Pics

When we found out about Luke last November it didn't feel real. I grieved alot. Nothing in my past compares to how difficult this season of my life is. I had always struggled with some anxiety, problems sleeping, worry. But all my previous worries didn't compare to finding out my baby has a degenerative condition. I know anxiety is so normal for most people.  It almost feels wrong not to worry. But the scripture clearly says not to be anxious about anything! Everyday I have to choose either fear and anxiety or peace. Its so hard not to think about the future, what condition Luke will be in a year from now or how I will manage it all. SMA progresses differently for each child so no one can tell us what to expect. Luke has a weak cough so even a little cold could become very serious for him. So many things I could be anxious about. Here's a scripture that is my prayer right now:
Teach me your way O Lord and I will walk in your truth; give me an undivided heart, that I may fear your name. Psalm 86:11
 Everytime I worry my heart is divided. So I'm learning to take captive my thoughts and stop right in the middle of an anxious thought and remember my God has it all under control.  Its feels like a battle to trust him, but I will keep at it. I want my heart to be undivided to Him.

Here's some pics of Luke in his special equipment.

 This wonderful stroller was donated to us and Luke loves it. We go on lots of long walks and its been such a blessing to have a supportive chair for Luke.

This is Luke in a stander. We are borrowing this one right now and will need to get our own eventually. Luke is in this twice a day for 30 min each. Its good for bone density. Luke likes it.

These are Luke's special shoes he wears in the stander to keep his feet and ankles straight.

Cough assist machine. Not fun at all. Every night we have to use this machine on Luke. The mask covers his nose and mouth and blows air into his lungs and then sucks it out. The purpose is to expand his lungs and will be really helpful when he has colds to clear mucus.

The U sitter is a fun seat for Luke. He loves pushing his cars on it and it makes him work on sitting up.